Wife Battering Is A Serious Issue That Is Usually Looked At By Feminists As One Of The Most Relevant Signs Of The Oppression

.. egies are best suited for treating women suffering from the syndrome. A simple, yet effective, behavioral strategy consists of two stages. In the initial stage, the battered woman removes herself from the uncontrollable or “shock cage” environment and isolates herself from her abuser. Generally, professionals help the victim escape by using assertiveness training, modeling and recommending use of the court system.

After the woman terminates the abusive relationship, professionals give the victim relapse prevention training to ensure that subsequent exposure to abusive behavior will not cause maladaptive behavior (Brown 1995). Although this strategy is effective, the model offered by Dr. Walker suggests that battered women usually do not actively seek out help. Therefore, concerned agencies and individuals must be pro-active and extremely sensitive to the needs and fears of victims. The classical battered women’s syndrome is a theory that has its origins in the research of Martin Seligman.

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Women in a domestic abuse situation experience a cycle of violence with their abuser. The cycle is composed of three phases: the tension building phase, active battering phase and calm loving respite phase. A gradual increase in verbal abuse marks the tension building phase. When this abuse culminates into an acute battering episode, the relationship enters the active battering phase. Once the acute battering phase ends, usually within two to twenty-four hours, the parties enter the calm loving respite phase, in which the batterer expresses remorse and promises to change.

After the cycle has played out several times, the victim begins to manifest symptoms of learned helplessness. Behavioral modification strategies offer an effective treatment for battered women’s syndrome. However, Dr. Walker’s model indicates that battered women may not seek the help that they need because of feelings of helplessness. The Male Music Scene In the song Push, emotional and social abuse is stressed.

At first glance or audio, the song is stressing the physical acts of violence that make up domestic abuse. “Push” makes one think of the physical act, but what Rob Thomas does is write/sing about the emotion that is in a relationship and how one can be “brown-beaten” into doing something against their will. The Lyrics for the song are: PUSH 1 she said I don’t know if I’ve ever been good enough I’m a little bit rusty, and I think my head is caving in and I don’t know if I’ve ever been really loved by a hand that’s touched me, well I feel like something’s gonna give and I’m a little bit angry, well 6 this ain’t over, no not here, not while I still need you around you don’t owe me, we might change yeah we just might feel good (chorus) I wanna push you around, I will, I will I wanna push you down, I will, I will 11 I wanna take you for granted, I wanna take you for granted I will she said I don’t know why you ever would lie to me like I’m a little untrusting when I think that the truth is gonna hurt ya and I don’t know why you couldn’t just stay with me 16 you couldn’t stand to be near me when my face don’t seem to want to shine cuz it’s a little bit dirty well don’t just stand there, say nice things to me I’ve been cheated I’ve been wronged, 21 and you you don’t know me, I can’t change I won’t do anything at all (chorus) oh but don’t bowl me over just wait a minute well it kinda fell apart, things get so crazy, crazy don’t rush this baby, don’t rush this baby (chorus) The chorus sets the scene for the song, line 9-12, but the pushing that is being mentioned is the emotional kind. Line 14, mentions “untrusting”, and waiting for the other to be able to trust, this is representative of the three phases of battering and would most resemble the “honeymoon phase”. This history of Matchbox 20 is quite interesting and it quite something for a debut song from a debut group to talk about domestic abuse, usually considered a “female topic”.

The band Matchbox 20 is made up of Rob Thomas: lead vocals; Kyle Cook: lead guitar, background vocals; Adam Gaynor: rhythm guitar, background vocals; Brian Yale: bass and Paul Doucette:drums. The band is characterized by soulful vocals, energized guitars, and probing lyrics about people whose lives are coming apart and their struggle to hold on this is what defines matchbox 20 and their Lava/Atlantic debut, “YOURSELF OR SOMEONE LIKE YOU.” These heartfelt and powerful songs have clearly touched a chord, for matchbox20 have quickly become one of the Nineties’ most remarkable and popular bands. On the strength of indelible across-the-board hits like “Push,” “3am,” and “Real World,” not to mention the band’s fiery live performances before sell-out crowds, “YOURSELF OR SOMEONE LIKE YOU” became a top five hit on the Billboard 200, garnering a quintuple platinum certification from the RIAA. By the end of last year, matchbox20 had unquestionably earned the 1997 Rolling Stone Reader’s Poll award for Best New Band. Produced by Matt Serletic, “YOURSELF OR SOMEONE LIKE YOU” builds momentum from the strong vocal delivery of the band’s principal songwriter Rob Thomas, who doesn’t so much sing these songs as bite into them.

Thomas’ vocals are ably complimented by the backing harmonies of lead guitarist Kyle Cook and rhythm guitarist Adam Gaynor, whose electric and acoustic guitar arrangements are propelled by the in-the-pocket rhythm section of drummer Paul Doucette and bassist Brian Yale.The dynamic interplay between these five young musicians is evident on songs like the upbeat “Argue” and the driving “Girl Like That.” The compelling characters that populate “YOURSELF OR SOMEONE LIKE YOU” wrestle with ghosts and demons, and while it’s not clear if they’ll win their battles, you can’t help but root for them. The folks who inhabit these songs are bruised and somewhat broken, but not so much so that they’ve lost their pride. The band’s breakout smash, “Push,” expertly nails the fear and emotional angst that is apart of abusive relationships. Thomas describes the romantic tug-of-war depicted in the Grammy-nominated “Push” as being “about how I was manipulated and how I handled it; how I grew to like it and got comfortable with it. I felt that was the only way that you could have a relationship was if you were being controlled or if you were being manipulated.” The songwriter adds that “Push” was actually written from three points of view, including, notably enough, the woman who inspired the song.

“Some people get the wrong idea and think that it’s about physical violence, when it’s really about emotional violence.” (Rolling Stone, 1997) A band Similar to Matchbox 20, is The Watchmen. This Canadian band identifies with them mainly because they released their first single, from their first album five years earlier almost to the day and it also speaks about domestic violence. However, The Watchmen take on the harder, and more physical aspects of domestic violence in their debut single Run & Hide: 1 I hate to see you lying there, curled up in a ball I hate to smash your pretty face against the fucking wall But I’m a desperate man girl, I’m down on my knees I hate to see you crying, hate to see those tears But you’re the one who’s sitting there just tossing out the years 6 Why you doing this? Why you wanna go? Won’t you ever understand? You’re my woman, and I’m your man And everytime I hear your name The floodgates open, blood it rains And I can’t see where I went wrong 11 You can’t leave while I’m not strong I can see you run and hide – oh baby won’t you ever let me See you run and hide – oh baby won’t you ever Let me live my life ‘Cause I’m afraid I just don’t love you 16 So pick yourself on up girl, straighten yourself out Pick up all the wasted years, you’re so torn about Put them back girl, back in the shelf On the shelf yeah You and me will be forever, I’m your hero, and you’re my treasure (chorus) (chorus) Unlike Push, song is quite direct, it speaks from the perspective of the abuser and talking to the “supposed” wife. In Line 1-2, the song opens quite graphically with the abuser talking to either himself or his spouse. He doesn’t know why he is a batterer, and he “hates” to see his wife on the ground, but this causes him to do further acts of violence.

The song stresses the internal battle the abuser feels when confronted with his own violent acts, how he is torn between wanting his wife to stay and wanting her to leave, Line 16-18. The chorus works with the music and is hard-edged and gritty as the abuser struggles within himself, wanting his wife to “Run and Hide” as the songs title, but also wanting to see her and make “blood it rains”, Line 8-15. McLaren Furnace Room was recorded in the summer of 1992 at Winfield Sound in Toronto, Ontario It was released by MCA records both in Canada and the United States to a warm welcome. The album was followed by intense touring in Canada and a few concerts in the States and was accompanied by two videos “Cracked” and “Run and Hide”. The singles off the album were: Cracked, Run and Hide, Must To Be Free, and Mister. Conclusion Both songs are examples of how, in the male dominated field of alternative music, it is possible that music can be used for positive media roles. Unfortunately, these kinds of songs and bands are the exception and not the rule.

In the music industry today, almost all bands that cater to the young adult male use degrading images and objectifying constructs in either their lyrics, albums or videos. Some examples of the most base include, “Smack my bitch up” by the Prodigy and “Slash and Burn” by the Deftones. Both of these songs emphasize hurting your spouse because she/he does not do things according to the way the dominant spouse wants. The media can be a powerful force in the communication of ideologies and new ways of thought, but because it is an open market and all ideas are considered worthy, to often the best/positive messages get trampled by the negative and more powerful messages. Bibliography : Browne, A.

1995. Reshaping the rhetoric: The nexus of violence, poverty, and minority status in the lives of women and children in the United States. Georgetown Journal on Fighting Poverty III (Fall): 17-23. Cormack, Elizabeth. Feminist Engagement with the Law CRIAW/ICREF, Ottawa, Ontario.

1993 Jacobson, Neil S. and Gottman, John M. When Men Batter Women Simon and Scuster, New York. 1998 Kirkwood, Catherine. Leaving Abusive Partners: From the Scars of Survival to the Wisdom for Change.

Sage Publications, London. 1993. MacLeod, Linda. Wife Battering in Canada: The Vicious Circle. Canadian Publishing Centre, Hull, Quebec. 1980 PATHS.

Provincial Association of Transition Houses Saskatchewan. Abuse of Women by Their Male Partners: The Saskatchewan Situation. 1996, 1997, Saskatoon, Sask. Raphael, J. and R. Tolman. 1997.

Trapped by poverty/Trapped by abuse: New evidence documenting the relationship between domestic violence and welfare. From the Project for Research on Welfare, Work, and Domestic Violence: a collaboration between Taylor Institute and the University of Michigan. Stark, Evan and Flitcraft, Anne. Women At Risk: Domestic Violence and Womena’s Health SAGE Publications, London. 1996 Valverde, Mariana and Macleod, Linda and Johnson, Kirsten. Wife Assault and the Canadian Criminal Justice System.

University of Toronto, Toronto. 1995. The Paladin Group. Violence Between Intimates http://www.silcom.com/~paladin/madv/stats.html, Nov 3rd, 1999.

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